Vacation Time!

The kids have been on vacation this week and have had lots of fun with their aunties, uncles and Mommy and Daddy. We have tried to make it special by doing things in the evenings when we are all home together and I think the kids are having fun!

Annie and Peter bonding on the first day of vacation!

Ellie Bean hamming it up for the camera!

This weekend was still pretty warm so we decided to get a move on and plant Annie's fairy garden.

The girls were due for tubbies but we decided to head out to the yard first so they were all looking a mess and didn't have their hair done - I think they looked adorable!

Ellie loves being outside no matter what the weather or what we are doing.

Annie is more at home in the garden than any kid I have ever known. She loves to get her hands dirty and plant and dig and grow things.

Elizabeth was looking gorgeous and having a blast watering everything in sight!

Molly girl was amazing - she helped me rake, weed, plant and take care of the girls. She was a huge help and we all had a blast!

Annie's friend the worm!

Yes, she wanted a picture of him!

We made a mess in the front yard but Bob was thrilled that we had gotten everything done and cleaned up by the time he got from home from work.

Our little LadyBug!

The pretty little path in the fairy garden!

Our finished garden with two houses filled with pinecones, rock paths, flowers, birds and a bird bath - the girls did a great job!

Molly Girl had a talent show at the Atria for Girl Scounts and it was so much fun. They honored anyone at the Atria who had been a girl scout in the past and it was really moving. Molly loves girl scouts and has made some really good friends there.

Molly and Alyssa

Molly and the other girls from the talent show on Sunday.

Molly and one of her best friends, Faith!

Annie waiting for her ice cream at McDonalds - we took the kids one night for some ice cream and to play in the playscape - they love it there.

Lizzie Bug was so excited!

Hamming it up for Mama!

The big kids having a fun moment together.

Ellie Bean making funny faces for Mama - Yes, she did get trapped at the top of the playscape forcing Mommy and Daddy to find someone to go rescue her - thank goodness for the big kids!

Lizzie Bug was so excited to wake up Wednesday morning and go with Auntie Ann for lunch and shopping!

Annie Bananie and her namesake do some serious damage when they head out shopping. Annie and Auntie Ann came back with lots of butterflies for the garden and other treats. Sister Anne apparently does her share of encouragement with the girls - and is the one who gets stuck riding the horsies at the mall with the girls.

I happen to notice the other day that in our doorway where we measure the kids there are several other measurements that we did not put there - Uncle Pat and uncle B have added their heights to the doorway for reference. I thought it was kind of cute!

Today we took the kids to the Fun Factory where they have an arcade and inflatibles to jump around in. The kids had a blast and Bob and I got to spend some quality time with them. Ellie still had school so she stayed home with Auntie Eileen and Uncle Jeff and got some one on one attention.

Lizzie's face was really bothering her but she made the best of everything and ended up having a blast once she got the hang of it!

Annie riding the doggie!

They had this cute little inflatible for the little girls - they loved it!

Lizzie throwing balls at Mama.

Peter said he had a fun even though he initially thought he was too old for this kind of thing!

Everyone loved the slide! Molly was first!

Peter sliding!

Elizabeth sliding!

Finally Annie made it down with lots of encouragement and a final little push from her big brother - it was kind of cute and she was laughing when she got to the bottom!

More Big kid fun!

Annie and Daddy driving and having fun!

Molly won 85 tickets at Skeeball - she was on a roll!

Lizzie could not figure out this game but she tried hard!

All in all I took few pictures but we have had some real fun and lots of quality time since the kids got out of school. Our one concern is that both Lizzie and Annie are complaining about their ears again so we may be back at square one with a short reprieve. We have ANOTHER doctor's appointment on Monday to find out what to do with Annie since she has not had clear ears in a few months now - this is where they begin to worry about drug resistance and hearing loss so they take things a bit more seriously! Poor Annie - she can't get a break with those poor little ears. Lizzie is going to see a specialist for her skin this week, also - just to check and see if there is something new we can try before we committ to oral steroids for a few weeks. She is starting to be in some pain from her rash on her cheeks so we need to get it taken care of! We have a long weekend filled with family and friends so I'm sure I will have lots of pictures soon!

GNM - ILY!

PAL

I had you stumped on the title for a minute didn't I? It stands for Positive Adoption Language (PAL). I read, write and study a whole lot about the topic of adoption and alot of topics related to it. I know what PAL is and have been exposed to many people who feel that anyone not using the correct language when referring to adoptions is just "ignorant" or doesn't care enough. Positive Adoption Language refers to statements like "He was given up for adoption" rather than the preferred, "His birth family made an adoption plan." Another example is "Natural Mother" rather than "Biological or Birth Mother." I am addressing this subject because it can be confusing and I have been corrected several times on this blog for using the incorrect language. I would do anything to ensure that my children, both the adopted ones and the biological ones, have a positive and healthy view of adoption, however, the fact is that the entire world does not adhere to my standards. My children are exposed to many wonderful people on a daily basis who may not use PAL, and, in fact, usually don't, but are still kind and wondeful people who are interested in adoption and hearing my childrens stories. They will hear positive adoption language, they will hear ambivilent adoption language and they will hear downright negative adoption language. It is my job to teach them how to address all of it and not to dismiss someone simply because they haven't read the books on how to talk to an adopted child. The real fact is that I can't be sure that my way is best anyways. My kids call their biological moms "Tummy Moms". Peter made it up and I loved it - a preschool description of the physical bond between adopted children and their birth moms. It is apparently very wrong - sends the wrong message, diminishes the role of the birth mother. I think it reminds the kids that ultimately everyone has a mom whose tummy they grow in and a mom who raises them - sometimes they are the same mom and sometimes they are different but every mom is treasured for the role they play in that child's life. In our house "Tummy Moms" works - it is positive, loving and universal - so much so that when I was pregnant with Lizzie, Peter and Molly both asked seperately who her tummy Mom was. An old lady saw us in a store one day last week - Bob and I dragging our multiracial little line of ducklings through the store and she stopped to admire the children. When she clearly pointed to Ellie and Peter as being "friends" of the othe children rather than siblings it was Annie who pointed out that they were her sister and brother and then shrugged he shoulders and said - "I mean - we all drive in the same van everyday - of course we're sisters and brothers." I don't have all the answers about adoption and I certainly learn every single day but I also try not to get caught up in a "method" or "language" - we learn as we go and accept people at face value. It is pretty rare for someone to purposely attempt to hurt one of our children so we assume the best and work out the details within our family later! So there you have it - POsitive Adoption Language Harding - Wheeler style!

Comment from Auntie Beth that needed to be added to this post! Auntie Beth is always willing to have open conversations with our children and anyone else about adoption, family and the important thing in life! We can't wait for Auntie Beth's visit next month!   I've always loved the reverence you've given to the term tummy mommy and never once considered it diminishing to you as the forever mommy...simply a completely separate reverence to the women who incubated your cherubs:-) and your kids pick up on your gratitude, which makes them feel even more special. People are always inspired by our family dynamic when I talk about tummy mommies and the adoption of my nieces and nephew...personally I think it makes you all the more wonderful as a Mom that you are unthreatened by a biological tie...and the kids are so well adjusted---they know exactly where they came from and why they are in their forever family now...the whole deal. Taught me alot, proud to be a member of the family:-) xoBethie

Snuggle time for the baby girls last week!

I love when they snuggle in together like this and have fun!

Annie stayed home a few days this week and Auntie Eileen must have thought she looked really really cute because she took lots of pictures of her! I love every single one of them although I did notice she is sitting on the kitchen counter!

Love this one - our little leprechaun!

Our little beauty - she is such a sweetie pie!

Uncle Jeff and Ellie sitting outside chatting!

Annie Bananie loving the ice cream from Daddy!

Peter Westley - yep - he is still wearing the grape fanta shirt!

My two gorgeous girls eating their favorite food - ice cream!

I took this picture of Lizzie because it cracks me up how she walks around all the time - sometimes randomly throwing on a bathing suit, other times just leaving her shirt unbuttoned and then sometimes just hanging out in underwear - she is truly a free spirit in every single way!

The kids are on vacation from school for a whole week and BOb and I have some fun things planned for them - a few special dates with the big kids and a farm visit for the little kids! I love having them home for a few days especially when work is quiet and I can hang out with them a bit. This vacation Bob and I are taking a day off together to have a family day but we haven't quite figured out what we are doing yet!

GNM - ILY!